STICKERS!

5/3 Today I was thinking about stickers and how cool they used to be. I mean I don’t know if kids still collect stickers but I used to have these super cool stickers that said things like NEAT! and Neato! They looked like this…

It’s a little bit silly that the word ‘neat’ used to be so cool that they made stickers about it. I think the equivalent of that sticker now would be something like this…





Dude how rich do you think Lisa Frank is? Those stickers used to be so damn cool! Like if you had Lisa Frank monkey stickers you were hip. If you had a sticker of a dolphin jumping over a multicolored beach ball with a rainbow sunset in the background no one could touch your coolness. This is a real Lisa Frank sticker. Like honestly really a sticker that I probably would have had on my trapper keeper in 5th grade....

I mean you can't really top a sticker of an ice cream sundae, with sprinkles and banana's and whip cream and chocolate, floating in space near the stars! With it's own rings! Like a fucking Planet! AND there are things in it's orbit! A purple tire, a candy corn a pink gumdrop that kinda looks like a fingernail and a rainbow heart! Which also has its own rings and things orbiting it as well. I mean this sticker is fucking genius! It's a candy rainbow wonderland! I bet in real life Lisa Frank is fucking CRAZY and she is like this hermit lady that thinks that shes living on planet rainbow sundae and all the pictures and stickers she drew to prove to everyone that this world that she thinks she lives in really exists but her psychologists totally stole them and turned them into stickers and named them after her because he felt bad about exploiting her but not really that bad because he still collects all the royalties to her stickers stationary and binders.
Poor Lisa Frank.


Back to stickers equivalent to now...after thinking about it, THIS is a more appropriate sticker sheet for the new generation of young teens...

Oh internet slang how I fucking loathe you.

Now that I'm pretty sure Lisa Frank somehow found out about her psychologist stealing her shit and making money off of her so she totally started to make these crappy sparkly little girls on stickers just so she could fuck him over. We need someone to take over her legacy! And really widen the target market. I think we could get college kids to love stickers if we just use totally hip imagery.  All we need is neon owls or birds or birds nests. or we can target super hip kids, take that Lisa Frank money sticker and throw a big pair of hip hop head phones on him. Too easy....